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Thread: support groups

  1. #1
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    Default support groups

    I posted a few months ago about reaching out to BFO for guidance in regards to the death of my partner before my DS was born.

    Today, they e-mailed me my registration form for a support group for a widow/widowers with dependant children support group.

    I'm mildly freaking out. I've never been to a support group before, nor do I really know what goes on. I have the media-influenced idea of what it could be like, but the thought of agreeing to go for the entire 9 weeks scares me.

    Has anyone been in a support group before? What was it like? I'm terrified that I won't say the right thing, or won't fit in because my situation is entirely different from a real widow/widowers.

    Gah. Someone tell me it'll be okay, and that I'll be fine. I just need reassurance that this will be a good thing.
    Meg
    mama to j

  2. #2
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    I think this will be a great thing. And who cares if your situation is totally unique? The emotions are the same I'm sure. I think this could be wonderful for you...and it takes a lot of bravery to start a program like this....so be proud and remember you are doing this for you and your son and for your future
    Jamie

    Mommy to Quin and Bronwen.

  3. #3
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    I think you will be fine Meg...........like Jamie said teh situation may be different but it doesnt change any emotions at all
    it will only do good for you and J to be able to talk it out
    Sara Mom to L(2004), N(2008), and D(2009)

    Life has no remote...So, if u don't like what's going on...get up and change it yourself!!!


  4. #4
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    ((hugs)) It will be okay Meg!
    Steph, Mommy to D Jan 4, 2009, and C Dec 9, 2010

  5. #5
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    meg you will be fine. you are a strong woman, you just dont see it.

    You never know if your situation is different from someone else there until you go.
    Kerry
    mom to
    Andrew 1/17/06 and Breanna 5/31/08

  6. #6
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    It will be fine! My friend went to a support group and her story was different from alot there but she made long lasting friendships and was sad when the group ended. She still keeps incontact with some of the girls and meet weekly. I think it will do wonders for you to connect with people who truly understand. And even tho your situation is different, its not any less tragic.
    Courtney - Mommy to Tiana(2002), Anthony (2006) & Andre (2008)

  7. #7
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    Thanks guys. Originally I did ask to be able to go...but now that its a reality it's scary. I think the part that scares me most is that these people will understand, and unlike telling someone who has never been in my shoes they'll get it. I think I'm scared of the emotions. I'm in a good place right now (not to say that in a few days, weeks, months I still will be) and I'm scared that it'll bring the emotions back and I'll be stuck dealing with the raw feelings again.

    *sigh* I hear everything you're saying, but somehow this makes it feel more real, and I try to avoid that.
    Meg
    mama to j

  8. #8
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    I think it's a great idea. I lost a BF 8 yrs ago and wished I had found a group to talk with. Last year I learned that a co worker had lost a BF ( just 6 months after myself, we didn't work together at the time) and it was wonderful to talk with her. It was such a relief to have someone "get it" and not just nod and say their were sorry. Even after that many yrs it made me feel better to hear someone else understand some of the things that I had felt were silly at the time it happened such feeling guilty when I would laugh or even eat because he couldn't. She got it and totally understood.
    Best of luck!

  9. #9
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    I have no clue what its like to be in your situation Meg! But I think as J grows and starts to ask questions, you might be better able to deal with it if your deal with the raw emotion stuff beforehand... again, i I have no clue what its like, but i do know how self destructive it can be to just shove emotion inside and not deal with it

    i think you will do great there, and you have a team of us backing you up <3

  10. #10
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    *gulp*

    Started last week, but I had to miss it because of an exam. Tonight is night 1 and I'm nervous beyond belief.

    If you could spare any good thoughts and "go well vibes" I would really appreciate it.
    Meg
    mama to j

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